Tesla’s European sales are in a tailspin. They only sold about 235,000 cars in Europe in 2025 – a huge 28% drop. In Germany, the numbers are bleak, with registrations collapsing 48% to 19,390 units. Meanwhile, BYD is lurking in the shadows like a hungry wolf, surging over 1,000% in Germany this January alone. If 94% of Germans wouldn’t consider buying a Tesla, who exactly is he expanding the factory for? The local squirrels?
To distract everyone from the smell of burning bridges, Musk started babbling about future tech. He’s promising a ramp-up of the Model Y and the arrival of the “Cybercab.” You know, the one with no steering wheel and no pedals. It’s a brave strategy, Cotton, let’s see if it pays off. Especially since the man in charge of the Cybercab, Victor Nechita, just packed his bags for Boston. He’s the latest in a long line of “intern-to-hero” managers to jump ship. Tesla now has zero original program managers left for any of its production vehicles. It’s a ship where the captain is shouting about the buffet while the entire engineering crew is rowing away in the lifeboats.
